Bin Wrinkled - the problem has a solution

["Mel Sinclair" <melsinclair1@yahoo.com>]

Cousins,
It is very difficult for me to write this email.  Until this time I believed
that I was reasonably intelligent.  I don't have a PhD, but I do hold a
Masters Degree in Education.  I'm really at a loss.  I've drafted this email
a hundred times but continue to use the delete key since the right words
just don't seem to be there.  I'm sure that some of my beloved cousins,
after reading this, will tell me that I *should* have hit the delete key.
However, please read this carefully.  I am not one of those nasty ole
Americans who thinks that "my way is the only way."  I'm seeking the wise
counsel of The Cousins, wherever you may be.  My intent is that this issue
be resolved, and resolved in a way that results in as few casualties as
possible.  To think of the word "collateral damage" in this situation makes
me nauseous.  We are talking about the future and about what our children
should learn from all of this.

Surely we can come together, our hearts and our minds, in this important
endeavor.  Perhaps there are many solutions.  We all know, however, that
some solutions are "right" and some are just plain "wrong" -- and with dire
consequences. Let us at least narrow the options to the few select ones that
have the most promise of preserving that which is very precious to us ....
or maybe in this situation, precious only to me.  I hope the everyone is
interested.

I've read email and visited more web sites than one might imagine.  The
answers that I get are so conflicting.  They go from one extreme to the
other.  I've heard about such tragedies in many places .... airports, office
buildings, automobiles, schools, and even parks where children play.  It
seems that sometimes these tragedies have a life of their own and are on a
route of self destruction.

Some have said that we really need to turn up the heat and that's the only
way to handle such an terrible situation.  Others tend to advise that we
study it.  Our actions are not reversible.  Once something is done in a
harsh way, it cannot be undone.

Others seem to say that we should talk about it.  We should find the root
cause of the problem and then we can avoid similar problems in the future.
Perhaps so, but when do you stop talking and take a different action?

In my opinion, I think that the continuing problem is too hurtful to linger
very long.  We need to take deliberate, though thoughtful, actions.  We MUST
NOT BICKER.  WE MUST come together with our vast pool of knowledge and
arrive at a good solution; one that we can all accept.  Somehow I believe
that through history the problem has been solved and that there is indeed an
obvious answer.

I am in deep despair as it seems whichever way I turn, whichever way I go,
some will think it wrong and may feel ill toward me .... and I might make a
huge mistake that cannot be corrected without severe penalty.  The unknown
creates such fear.  Perhaps more study and dialogue is the only way at this
point.  We certainly can't be legitimately criticized for that approach.

Now let me be more specific ... Let's define the problem.  Without a proper
definition, the problem cannot be solved.

Background:
This is how the terror began:
I took my family to a Celtic Rock concert (Seven Nations) last Friday night.
I thought that this would be a good idea since we had spent the previous
day, Thanksgiving Day, recalling all of the horrors of times past in the
USA.  We were really on a high!  But, no, on Friday the 23rd, little did we
know what was ahead of us.

Situation:
The concert was a "sit-down" concert, unusual for a rock concert.  Perhaps
that should have been my first clue.  On top of that, we had a 90 minute
drive home from the concert.  The result: the rear of my Kilt is
"terror"-ably wrinkled.  Others must have had kilts that have "bin
wrinkled".  I have laid it out on the bed and coddled it ... no noticeable
results.  It is now peacefully draped from a clothes hanger with the
stubborn wrinkles making no move to correct themselves.  Oh, I must mention
this.  I checked and the wrinkles are not only on the outside but also on
the inside.  Is there any hope?  Perhaps I'm just expecting too much and I
clearly don't understand.  Why do they harass me so?

Result:  The wrinkles simply don't want to come out.  It's as if they are
buried deeply.

Actions and Possible actions:
I feel that to iron the kilt is such a barbarous act, and I am fearful that
I may harm the material or even harm some of the material that isn't even
involved with the wrinkles.  Fear seems to be of vital concern using this
approach.  I've talked with it and that didn't seem to help.  Perhaps my
lack of a PhD, and certainly my lack of wisdom, is limiting my ability to
find the proper words.  It's as though it's mind is made up.  Perhaps the
DNA was simply defective .... did the sheep have an unhappy childhood?
....and it won't eat a thing.  I won't go into what food that was offered,
but it is a very "pop"-ular dish with a tart like taste.  I've been studying
the wrinkles for several days now with no good results.  Maybe I need to
study it longer.  Although winter is approaching, I plan to wear it in about
two weeks.  Drat!  That may simply just not be possible.  Not only do I need
to solve the problem, but it is VITAL that it look good.  Unless it looks
good to everyone, I will feel that I have failed.  It must look good, feel
good and perhaps even solve the problem.

Help!
What should I do to get the wrinkles out?  Someone told me that the wool
might just be too tight (actually they said "uptight") and maybe it needs to
relax a bit; then, the wrinkles might fall out more easily.  I hope that the
wrinkles don't spread while I'm trying to figure this out.  We must do the
honorable thing ... but what is that?  Dear me, dear me.  Cousins, please
help.  Maybe I can spend more money and buy another one.  Can you spare a
donation for a worthy cause?  Is there a self-help group?  There MUST be a
government grant for the study of "ethnic clothing."

Alas, can anyone give me good advice as to how to handle this?

Future?
I guess the next time I should just turn the other cheek?

Thank you for your assistance.

Mel of South Carolina