ROTFL!!!! :):):)
Thanks for lightening my day Euan
Margaret :)
At 08:29 PM 04/12/98 +0000, you wrote:
>Hi everyone, here's one I received that I thought might appeal ...
>
>Euan
> >>
> >> > Edward Longshanks (Edward I of England) comes to Scotland to conquer
>the
> >> > Scots. He brings 4,000 men with him. As he reaches the battlefield,
> >> > suddenly on the crest of a hill there appears a solitary figure, a
> >> little
> >> > short ginger-haired guy in a kilt.
> >> >
> >> > "Hammer of the Scots?" yells the wee Scottish guy on the hill. "Come
>up
> >> > here, ya English bastards, and I'll give ye hammer!"
> >> >
> >> > Edward turns to his commander and says, "Take 20 men and deal with that
> >> > Scottish upstart!"
> >> >
> >> > The commander sends 20 men over the hill to kill the Scot. Ten minutes
> >> > later, at the crest of the hill, the little Scot appears again. "Ye
> >> > English
> >> > bastards!" he yells. "Come on the rest of ye!! Come on, I'll have
> >> ye!!!"
> >> >
> >> > Edward is getting somewhat annoyed. He turns to his commander. "Take
> >> 100
> >> > men and kill that little guttersnipe!"
> >> >
> >> > The commander sends 100 men over the hill to do the job. Ten minutes
> >> > later,
> >> > the little Scot appears at the top of the hill again, his hair all
> >> > sticking
> >> > up, his shirt a bit torn. "Ye English SCUM!" he yells. "I'm just
> >> warming
> >> > up!!! Come and get me!!!"
> >> >
> >> > Edward loses patience. "Commander, take 400 men and personally WIPE
>HIM
> >> > OFF
> >> > THE FACE OF THE EARTH!" he yells.
> >> >
> >> > The commander gulps, but leads 400 men on horseback over the crest of
> >> the
> >> > hill.
> >> >
> >> > Ten minutes later, the little Scotsman is back. His clothing is all
> >> torn,
> >> > his face is covered in blood, snot and Irn-Bru, and he yells, "Is that
> >> the
> >> > best ye can do???? You're bloody WIMMIN!!!! Come on, come and have a
> >> go
> >> > ya
> >> > bunch of Jessies!!!"
> >> >
> >> > Edward turns to his second in command. "Take 1000 men over that hill
> >> and
> >> > don't come back till you've killed him!" he commands.
> >> >
> >> > The second in command gathers the men and they ride off over the hill
>to
> >> > their fate. Ten minutes later, one of the English troops appears back
> >> at
> >> > the top of the hill. He's covered in blood and his clothes are all
> >> torn.
> >> >
> >> > "Your Majesty!!" he yells. "It's a trap!!! There's two of them!!!"
> >
>
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